The Orange and Green Machine

This post is dedicated to my Mother, Father, sister, other sister, (nope, I didn't accidentally leave out my brother) and friends to whom communication lately has been almost non-existent. The last time I talked to my parents was the day after Fathers day (better late than never or something like that) and my mother brought it to my attention that I never call. I quickly retaliated with "Well you never call me either!" to which she replied "every time we call you never answer, and anyway you said your phone doesn't really get reception in that apartment".

Damn! Mom wins again. I guess mothers have to be smarter than you though, or else you'll end up selling your body on street corners to rich, sex crazed businessmen with weird fetishes no one should ever have to know about. But I digress.

Today's post is about the chapter of my life I like to call " The Orange and Green Machine". The title should be obvious to most of you, but just in case you haven't had your coffee yet, or are living in a world that doesn't revolve around me, I'll explain.

I've been living with my brother, or as I'll be referring to him today "Captain Orange" and his fiancee, "Queen Green". Their wedding is about two months away, and life in this apartment has been, well . . . a little hectic.

Thus far, living with Captain Orange and Queen Green has been going well . . . at least for me, who knows what they talk about when they go into their fancy bedroom that has "real walls".

We all sort of live on different schedules though, so that may be helping the situation. Captain Orange is the first to leave in the morning at a time that I barely like to speak of, let alone awake at . . . 7:30 am. I do get joy out of the fact that I hear him every morning and smile as I roll over to go back to sleep. Next is Queen Green. She has the worst working hours of the day. I'm pretty sure whoever started writing these hours on an actual schedule only did it out of spite and bitterness for a person who had wronged them in some way and needed to be punished . . . 11:30 - 8. Then there's me. I work at night . . . usually starting at 4, and don't get home until anywhere between 10 and 12pm. So when you think about it, Queen Green is the only one who never gets to enjoy having the apartment all to herself, and though she and Captain Orange claim she never likes to be alone, I don't truly believe it.

Yes, as you can see, we are indeed, three peas in one pod . . . and if you can't see that, then I'll just clarify that we are . . . except that I'm the pea that's slightly farther away from the other two peas that are really close together . . . like you can two bites of this pea, and one of them is just me and mostly pod, while the other is two peas and hardly any pod.

So what was I talking about? I want to say different varieties of peas, but that doesn't seem right.

Ahh yes, my life.

Aside from the madness that is "Watching two people plan a wedding", I am starting to somewhat enjoy my new job. Unfortunately, that's all I can really say about that, as I have signed a legal document stating that I will not talk about my job on the internet.

I have also taken on a few new challenges, and before I talk about them, I urge you all to jump on my bandwagon and try not to fall off.

1. I am training to do 100, yes there are 2 zeros after that 1, MAN pushups in a row. Captain Orange showed me this website that trains you to do 100 pushups in a row. I've been doing it for about 2 weeks now and am currently up to about 15. Doesn't seem like that many right? Well, in my initial exhaustion test I could only do 3. Which means that I can do 5 times as many now. Oh, and did I mention that the day after I did those initial 3, my entire body was sore?

2. I've given up eating . . . wait for it . . . while watching television. It's been quite the experiment actually. I wanted to see if I would eat less . . . because I think when you eat in front of the tv, you are so engrossed in what you're staring at, that you forget to enjoy your food, which only leaves you wanting more. Not to mention tv and eating go together like those 2 farther away peas I was talking about before. It has actually been really tough. I'm still having trouble with it (it's been about 3 weeks), especially when Captain Orange and Queen Green make dinner, then sit down and turn the tv on to eat. Leaving me, sitting alone in my "Bedroom" to eat my dinner somewhat alone, while still in very good earshot of the television*.

Just to clarify, I'm not angry that they do this, they have very little tv watching time on their hands lately, and it has really only happened like once.

Also, I don't count watching sports as watching tv because, well, I hate sports, and if say, a baseball game is on, I might as well be watching a fly on the wall, because they are more boring to me than church. Plus, it's hard to come home and not find Captain Orange watching a a Dodger game.

3. Caffeine. What can I say? The caffeine wagon is one bumpy ass ride and for some reason I always get a seat on the edge. I was able to go about a month without it, before the wagon came to a screaming halt and said "I'm sorry, you don't have enough will power to stay on this ride little darlin, you best be getting off here" as it pulled over right in front of a Starbucks.

Other than that, living with Captain Orange and Queen Green has made me quite curious about how exactly they met, and every little detail that went down during their "getting to know each other stage". Sure, we all know the shell of their story. Boy has blog, girl has blog. Boy comments on girls comment on other girls blog. Girl is intrigued by boys comment, checks out boys blog. Then boy checks out girls blog . . . and the rest is history. But what's inside that shell! Holy Cow! It's almost like a soap opera to me. But not a cheesy daytime soap opera, more like a classy night time soap opera . . . like ER, or Grey's Anatomy.

And in case you don't know the exact origin of of their first "meeting", well, here's a link. You have to go to the comments section of this girls post. Queen Green is Cadiz12 and Captain Orange is Jon.

I've also started reading both of their blogs from the beginning. Something I have never really been interested in doing before. I also suggest you attempt this as well . . . if you're family or even a fellow blogger that is. I have a whole new perspective on Queen Greens blog now that I know her a bit better, and it really adds to the writing.

Well, that's all I care to talk about right now, as I really have to use the restroom, and I've been writing this for about an hour and a half now.

* My bedroom was formerly their dining room. It's walls are made up of sheets. Which really gives the phrase " those walls are paper thin" a whole new meaning. You might think living in a sheeted off wall would get old fast, but I've grown quite used to it. I suppose if I had a boyfriend or a trashy reputation, the story would be quite different. But the goal right now is for all of us to save a little money, because as most of you know, I have no car. If you didn't know that, shame on you for not reading my blog more. You can find info on that here.