Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Insomnia

Well, it's 1 a.m. right now, and I can't ...or rather, I don't feel like sleeping.

It's weird how sometimes you'll be thinking about something and be completely fine, but then, what you were thinking about leads to other things and before you know it you feel like crap. Don't get me wrong, I'm not depressed or anything, just having a moment.

Sometimes I'll be thinking about something or somebody and I'll get so angry and I can't stop it. Like anger ever solves anything anyway right?

Last fall I took a class called "Death and Bereavement Psychology" and one of the lectures I actually remember was about how when you feel sad about something, you shouldn't try and block it or you'll never get over it. You'll think you have and then one day BAM ...there it is again, and you're back to square one.

There's a certain person I wish I had never met, and I really mean that (in case you are wondering it's not a certain ex-boyfriend you might all be thinking of). Sometimes you meet people and they turn out to be a jerk, but you learn something from it and you realize why you had to go through that. I feel like this isn't one of those people, just a jerk that I wish I had never been nice to.

Anyway, I suppose that's all I really want to say tonight...sorry this post was kind of sappy...who knows if I can type sappy, maybe one day I'll actually be able to show my emotions in person. I guess only time will tell.

Oh, and one more thing...if the aformentioned "jerk" is reading this...it's a free country and I'll type what I want. Deal with it!

4 comments:

Jon said...

You know what I do to pass the time, I download the latest Roger Clyne album, "Turbo Ocho" (but you can use Weezer's latest, which came out yesterday... like you didn't already know) and then throw a deck of cards into a small bucket (I use the cover for a medium sized cd spindle) placed about 5 feet away. It's pretty hard.

Anonymous said...

Do you maybe spell insomnia R-E-D B-U-L-L?

cadiz12 said...

i often do my best housecleaning when i'm angry. you're right, there's no use blocking it when you can channel it into something productive, especially when it'll just come back again later.

i just wish i hadn't scrubbed all the new grout out of the tiles before it had completely set when i was mopping the floor.

Madelyn said...

anonymous - - I'm off the Bull.

Jon - - - Thanks for the info.

Cadiz - - - Thanks for the advice, and I'm sorry about your tile grout incident.