Because I live in the Chicago area.
Sunday, April 29, 2012
Saturday, April 28, 2012
The Great Grammar Challenge of 2012
April . . . something or other . . . a day that will go down in grammar history. A day that would make my 6th, 7th and 8th grade English teacher, Miss Debbie Stringer, proud.
Not of me, but of someone I once worked with (although it was for a short period, and I hardly remember him).
His name is John Alexander, and he . . . is a grammar genius.
It all started a few weeks ago when my sister-in-law came home distraught. Distraught over a recent discovery in a song that has recently become popular around the world and in our own home as well.
There was/is a grammatical error.
Yes, you read that right. A grammatical error.
Upon hearing this, I can't say that my faith in the American music industry wasn't shaken.
These are supposed to be well educated, upstanding citizens, I thought. If we can't count on them to use proper grammar, who can we count on?
With this kind of misuse of the English language going on, what will become of our children . . . and our children's children?
How can we expect them to learn when we don't even know how to properly say what we want to say!?
Outraged and ashamed, I decided to put a friends knowledge to the test.
I had been in California a week prior and visited with my friend Steve Murray, a person who also can't stand improper grammar. If he could find the mistake, maybe there was still hope. I don't know why this would insure hope in America's future, but I was also bored and wanted to see if he could find the error.
I texted him exclaiming, "Grammar Challenge! There is an error in the song 'We are Young' by the band Fun., can you find it?" (It is important to note at this point that the bands name is Fun with a period after it, so the comma I just put after that period is not a mistake).
Steve, being extremely confident in his ability to correct any and all grammar mistakes, accepted the challenge and began working feverishly to find it.
Over the next 3 days he spent day and night looking for the error. He called in sick to work, skipped his church choir practice, and drank Red Bull after Red Bull, until finally . . . he gave up. He just didn't see it.
Disappointed and ashamed in himself, he spent the next five days curled up in a ball on his feux leather sofa, watching episode after episode of The Dick Van Dyke show, and crying himself to sleep at night.
Finally, on the sixth day, in a fit of drunken rage, he punched several holes in his dining room wall. When his roommate, John Alexander, came home that night, he asked Steve what the hell was going on?
After explaining what had happened, John too, became intrigued by the challenge, and offered his help.
With no one else to turn to, Steve, although still drunk, graciously accepted.
After just minutes of looking over a written version of the lyrics, John triumphantly found the error and explained it to Steve.
So there you have it. A happy ending to my story. As long as there are people like John, willing to patiently teach the rules of grammar to the confused and misunderstood, our country might just stand a chance.
As in all challenges, there was of course a prize . . . and since this prize was coming from me, I'm sure that you can guess just what is was . . . an envelope.
One for Steve, for taking the time to learn just exactly what is wrong with that song, and one for John, the hero of this story.
And this one for John . . . because who doesn't like Star Wars? Although, after speaking with my brother about it, I was informed that Boba Fett would have been a better way to go. I said, "but he is hardly even in the movie!". "Doesn't matter," he replied, "he's fricken' awesome!"
Touche brother, touche.
Each envelope is accompanied with a Certificate of Authenticity to assure the owner that it was indeed made by these (my) magic hands.
So now, I challenge all of you, with the promise of one of my envelopes that will be especially tailored to what you like, as a prize, to find the grammatical error in the song for which this post is based on.
* The events of this story may have been altered for dramatic effect.
** All grammatical errors in this story are hereby null and void by authority of . . . me.
*** Sure, there have been promises of prizes in previous posts, but this time I mean it.
Click here to go directly to the lyrics of the song.
Not of me, but of someone I once worked with (although it was for a short period, and I hardly remember him).
His name is John Alexander, and he . . . is a grammar genius.
It all started a few weeks ago when my sister-in-law came home distraught. Distraught over a recent discovery in a song that has recently become popular around the world and in our own home as well.
There was/is a grammatical error.
Yes, you read that right. A grammatical error.
Upon hearing this, I can't say that my faith in the American music industry wasn't shaken.
These are supposed to be well educated, upstanding citizens, I thought. If we can't count on them to use proper grammar, who can we count on?
With this kind of misuse of the English language going on, what will become of our children . . . and our children's children?
How can we expect them to learn when we don't even know how to properly say what we want to say!?
Outraged and ashamed, I decided to put a friends knowledge to the test.
I had been in California a week prior and visited with my friend Steve Murray, a person who also can't stand improper grammar. If he could find the mistake, maybe there was still hope. I don't know why this would insure hope in America's future, but I was also bored and wanted to see if he could find the error.
I texted him exclaiming, "Grammar Challenge! There is an error in the song 'We are Young' by the band Fun., can you find it?" (It is important to note at this point that the bands name is Fun with a period after it, so the comma I just put after that period is not a mistake).
Steve, being extremely confident in his ability to correct any and all grammar mistakes, accepted the challenge and began working feverishly to find it.
Over the next 3 days he spent day and night looking for the error. He called in sick to work, skipped his church choir practice, and drank Red Bull after Red Bull, until finally . . . he gave up. He just didn't see it.
Disappointed and ashamed in himself, he spent the next five days curled up in a ball on his feux leather sofa, watching episode after episode of The Dick Van Dyke show, and crying himself to sleep at night.
Finally, on the sixth day, in a fit of drunken rage, he punched several holes in his dining room wall. When his roommate, John Alexander, came home that night, he asked Steve what the hell was going on?
After explaining what had happened, John too, became intrigued by the challenge, and offered his help.
With no one else to turn to, Steve, although still drunk, graciously accepted.
After just minutes of looking over a written version of the lyrics, John triumphantly found the error and explained it to Steve.
So there you have it. A happy ending to my story. As long as there are people like John, willing to patiently teach the rules of grammar to the confused and misunderstood, our country might just stand a chance.
As in all challenges, there was of course a prize . . . and since this prize was coming from me, I'm sure that you can guess just what is was . . . an envelope.
One for Steve, for taking the time to learn just exactly what is wrong with that song, and one for John, the hero of this story.
This one was for Steve. I chose this as both a punishment (at first he lied to me and made it seem as though he had come up with the answer on his own, before admitting the truth shortly after) and a reward. You see, we used to work at In N Out together, so the image should bring back both happy and frustrating memories.
Touche brother, touche.
Each envelope is accompanied with a Certificate of Authenticity to assure the owner that it was indeed made by these (my) magic hands.
So now, I challenge all of you, with the promise of one of my envelopes that will be especially tailored to what you like, as a prize, to find the grammatical error in the song for which this post is based on.
* The events of this story may have been altered for dramatic effect.
** All grammatical errors in this story are hereby null and void by authority of . . . me.
*** Sure, there have been promises of prizes in previous posts, but this time I mean it.
Click here to go directly to the lyrics of the song.
Friday, April 27, 2012
Can you tell me how to get, how to get to . . .
Sesame Street?
When I was a kid, I loooooved Sesame Street. I'm pretty sure it was my favorite show next to Zoobilee Zoo, but only because Zoobilee Zoo was less accessible, therefore making it much more in demand . . . in my book anyway.
I used to day dream about Big Bird, The Cookie Monster, Oscar the grouch and pretty much the whole gang dropping by my house to say hello. I mean, who didn't?
Which is why I decided to make this envelope. I figure, moms everywhere can buy them by the dozen and put invitations for their kids party inside. How could you not go to a party with Elmo on the envelope of the invitation?
When I was a kid, I loooooved Sesame Street. I'm pretty sure it was my favorite show next to Zoobilee Zoo, but only because Zoobilee Zoo was less accessible, therefore making it much more in demand . . . in my book anyway.
I used to day dream about Big Bird, The Cookie Monster, Oscar the grouch and pretty much the whole gang dropping by my house to say hello. I mean, who didn't?
Which is why I decided to make this envelope. I figure, moms everywhere can buy them by the dozen and put invitations for their kids party inside. How could you not go to a party with Elmo on the envelope of the invitation?
I'm working on a Big Bird one too, but I had to start with the most popular character of course.
Thursday, April 26, 2012
You Think You're Cooler Than Me?
Today I took a step towards a higher intelligence.
I got a Library card for the local Library.
For those of you who are unfamiliar, a library is a place where you can go and borrow, that's right, borrow, any book you want . . . FOR FREE! They also have DVD's, CD's, magazines . . . the possibilites are endless.
It kind of makes you wonder why anyone has ever bought a book in their whole life! I know I feel like a fool for ever doing so.
And today, as I'm sure is true for every other day, the library was bumpin'. Apparently other people know about this place, and they are taking advantage!
I woke up at 7:30 this morning knowing exactly what I wanted and was hardly able to contain myself until 9:30, the time it opened.
Here's what I brought home:
That's right! Dick Van Dyke has an autobiography and I'm listening to it for FREE. In fact I put it on my computer. I OWN it! FOR FREE!
FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
The nice thing about having a crush on the younger version of an older celebrity: You get to hear their whole life story. It would be like if I got to read Ty Burrell's autobiography, today!
Nothing's better than instant gratification.
Why the audio version you ask? I can't very well have my eyes crap out on me when I'm super into the book and want to keep reading, can I?! CAN I?!
PLUS, he narrates. I would be an idiot to get any other version of this book. (i.e. paperback, hardback, digital)
I'm currently on chapter 12, and so far, I would highly recommend it to anyone who's interested in: a career in comedy, The Dick Van Dyke Show, Dick Van Dyke, handsome men, handsome men that are a lot older, Reno, Nevada (yup, he talks about it), Los Angeles, California, or television . . . in general.
I guess I'll show you another one of my envelopes now. Don't be too disappointed, it's not Dick Van Dyke or anything, but . . . I guess it's pretty cool.
This is one of my earlier envelopes (you know, from like 2 weeks ago) so it's not at the same level of complexity that I'm currently capable of, but it's Mickey, and everyone likes Mickey, right?
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
I will always want this DVD
I've fallen in love again. It was only a matter of time I guess. We met when I was about 12, and I sort of thought he was cute then, but now that I'm older . . . and he's available on Netflix, things have gotten serious.
His name is Dick Van Dyke. You may have heard of him. He had a television series back when I was negative 23.
Isn't he handsome?
And so, in order to honor him and all of his handsomeness, I of course, made an envelope.
Once he sees this, he's sure to ask me over for dinner.
( I don't want to marry him or anything, I mean, he's 87 . . . but meeting him would be pretty sweet.)
By the way, in case you weren't clear, my envelopes aren't plain envelopes with a drawing on top. I cut all the images out with an exacto knife and then put another piece of paper behind them.
They just got a lot more impressive, didn't they?
His name is Dick Van Dyke. You may have heard of him. He had a television series back when I was negative 23.
Isn't he handsome?
And so, in order to honor him and all of his handsomeness, I of course, made an envelope.
Once he sees this, he's sure to ask me over for dinner.
( I don't want to marry him or anything, I mean, he's 87 . . . but meeting him would be pretty sweet.)
By the way, in case you weren't clear, my envelopes aren't plain envelopes with a drawing on top. I cut all the images out with an exacto knife and then put another piece of paper behind them.
They just got a lot more impressive, didn't they?
Monday, April 23, 2012
Madelyn Muller: Assistant Carpenter
Today I volunteered to help rebuild the DeMaat Theater stage at The Second City. If you look closely at the back wall there, you can see a few white spots . . . those are holes . . . and I don't want to brag, but . . . I helped spackle those holes.
So yeah . . . add carpenter to my resume.
In other news, who likes The Hunger Games?!
Everybody, that's who! Which is why I'm sure this is guaranteed to be my best selling envelope EVER!
Saturday, April 21, 2012
The 360
I think the record needs to be set straight. I can understand why most of you may think I visit the grocery store everyday. Maybe you think that since I have so much time on my hands, I wander the aisles just looking for ridiculous items, leaving with nothing more than an out-dated iPhone* full of pictures.
Well that is not the case.
Although, I can't say the idea isn't currently intriguing me. However, the truth is that when I do go to the grocery store (which is probably more often than most, as it is right next to my gym and I like to eat fresh fruit on a regular basis) I take pictures of more than one item I happen to think is ridiculous.
Now that I've cleared up that misunderstanding, I'll go ahead and show you today's "Thing I saw at the Grocery Store" (once again, brought to you by Jewel-Osco). Why spend less money on plain plastic baggies when you could have these?
I mean, it's not like writing a message on a plain bag using a permanent marker is a plausible alternative to embarrassing your kids at lunch time in front of their friends, am I right?
Moving along.
Today I've decided to blow your minds just a little bit more than usual. I get the feeling that most of you think I'm just an "Amateur" envelope maker . . . and if you use the word "amateur" to describe someone who has yet to make a profit from their skill . . . then, yes . . . yes, you would be correct. However, I feel like that's a mere technicality. I mean, people** are starting to call me "The Paper Surgeon" for goodness sake! This isn't just a "craft" I do, it's an artform. With that being said, I am not going to post a picture of one of my envelopes today, because, with the help of my brother, I have found a much more . . . deserving way to showcase my work. All YOU have to do, is click on the link below and wait approximately 10 - 20 seconds for it to load.
This is the link, just click it. CLICK IT DAMNIT!
* The iPhone is a 3GS and I really like it, but I wanted to use descriptive words, OKAY!
**It's me, I'm calling myself that . . . but it's well deserved, I assure you!
Although, I can't say the idea isn't currently intriguing me. However, the truth is that when I do go to the grocery store (which is probably more often than most, as it is right next to my gym and I like to eat fresh fruit on a regular basis) I take pictures of more than one item I happen to think is ridiculous.
Now that I've cleared up that misunderstanding, I'll go ahead and show you today's "Thing I saw at the Grocery Store" (once again, brought to you by Jewel-Osco). Why spend less money on plain plastic baggies when you could have these?
I mean, it's not like writing a message on a plain bag using a permanent marker is a plausible alternative to embarrassing your kids at lunch time in front of their friends, am I right?
Moving along.
Today I've decided to blow your minds just a little bit more than usual. I get the feeling that most of you think I'm just an "Amateur" envelope maker . . . and if you use the word "amateur" to describe someone who has yet to make a profit from their skill . . . then, yes . . . yes, you would be correct. However, I feel like that's a mere technicality. I mean, people** are starting to call me "The Paper Surgeon" for goodness sake! This isn't just a "craft" I do, it's an artform. With that being said, I am not going to post a picture of one of my envelopes today, because, with the help of my brother, I have found a much more . . . deserving way to showcase my work. All YOU have to do, is click on the link below and wait approximately 10 - 20 seconds for it to load.
This is the link, just click it. CLICK IT DAMNIT!
* The iPhone is a 3GS and I really like it, but I wanted to use descriptive words, OKAY!
**It's me, I'm calling myself that . . . but it's well deserved, I assure you!
Friday, April 20, 2012
Tomatoes and Elephants
When you go to the grocery store to purchase tomatoes, how many do you usually end up buying?
One?
Maybe just a half a one?
Yeah, me too. Which is why today's "Thing I saw at the Grocery Store" (brought to you by Jewel-Osco) would be perfect for you!
I've also had trouble figuring out just how and where to store my tomato/ half of a tomato until I use it. Well not anymore, no sir.
How did we ever get by before? I don't know and I don't wanna hafta* think about it!
(Please use enthusiastic/ anticipatory announcer-man type voice below)
. . . And now, if you wouldn't mind making a drum roll sound in your head . . . based on my sister's suggestion from yesterday . . . that's right, I am now taking suggestions** . . . Ladies and Gentlemen, bloggers and non-bloggers . . . for your viewing pleasure . . . MY ENVELOPE OF THE DAY!
(Please insert screaming and hooting here, as if a crowd were going wild)
* I meant to spell it "hafta" in order to create a certain whiny, child-like voice in your head. Did it work?
** I am only taking suggestions. If I like it, I'll use it. If I don't like it, I will make it for money. The amount will vary based on several factors that I cannot disclose . . . ever.
One?
Maybe just a half a one?
Yeah, me too. Which is why today's "Thing I saw at the Grocery Store" (brought to you by Jewel-Osco) would be perfect for you!
I've also had trouble figuring out just how and where to store my tomato/ half of a tomato until I use it. Well not anymore, no sir.
How did we ever get by before? I don't know and I don't wanna hafta* think about it!
(Please use enthusiastic/ anticipatory announcer-man type voice below)
. . . And now, if you wouldn't mind making a drum roll sound in your head . . . based on my sister's suggestion from yesterday . . . that's right, I am now taking suggestions** . . . Ladies and Gentlemen, bloggers and non-bloggers . . . for your viewing pleasure . . . MY ENVELOPE OF THE DAY!
(Please insert screaming and hooting here, as if a crowd were going wild)
* I meant to spell it "hafta" in order to create a certain whiny, child-like voice in your head. Did it work?
** I am only taking suggestions. If I like it, I'll use it. If I don't like it, I will make it for money. The amount will vary based on several factors that I cannot disclose . . . ever.
Thursday, April 19, 2012
Going the Distance
Today's "Thing I saw at the Grocery store" Is brought to you by . . . wait for it . . . Dominicks! I bet you thought I was going to say Jewel-Osco.
I'm not sure of the California equivalent to Dominicks, but I think it may be Safeway. It doesn't really matter anyway, because todays thing is something you'll never want to find . . . and if it is, we probably shouldn't be friends anymore.
That's right, an overpriced DVD.
(Capital letters do not always equal yelling, this is simply loud talking . . . a game show host type voice, if you will)
AND NOW, FOR YOUR FAVORITE PORTION OF MY DAILY POST . . . LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, BOYS AND GIRLS . . . MY LATEST ENVELOPE!
. . . and now for a side view . . .
And now the theme song will be stuck in your head for the rest of the day. You're welcome.
I'm not sure of the California equivalent to Dominicks, but I think it may be Safeway. It doesn't really matter anyway, because todays thing is something you'll never want to find . . . and if it is, we probably shouldn't be friends anymore.
That's right, an overpriced DVD.
(Capital letters do not always equal yelling, this is simply loud talking . . . a game show host type voice, if you will)
AND NOW, FOR YOUR FAVORITE PORTION OF MY DAILY POST . . . LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, BOYS AND GIRLS . . . MY LATEST ENVELOPE!
. . . and now for a side view . . .
And now the theme song will be stuck in your head for the rest of the day. You're welcome.
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Hippos don't eat with forks
Today's "Thing I saw at the Grocery Store" is also brought to you by Jewel-Osco.
This item taught me that tooth picks are the poor mans appetizer fork.
I had to use every ounce of self control in my body to resist purchasing them. I wanted to eat regular sized meals with them so I could feel like a giant.
Someday . . . some. day.
Today's addition to my envelope line is not miniature. Perhaps this is a dumb business move, but I have my reasons. I would like to dedicate this envelope to my oldest sister, for she will probably receive it someday.
I call it, the animal silhouette line. As usual, please feel free to pin this to Pinterest now.
This item taught me that tooth picks are the poor mans appetizer fork.
I had to use every ounce of self control in my body to resist purchasing them. I wanted to eat regular sized meals with them so I could feel like a giant.
Someday . . . some. day.
Today's addition to my envelope line is not miniature. Perhaps this is a dumb business move, but I have my reasons. I would like to dedicate this envelope to my oldest sister, for she will probably receive it someday.
I call it, the animal silhouette line. As usual, please feel free to pin this to Pinterest now.
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
. . . and you shall spread the butter of a Lamb . . .
I've decided to start a series of posts entitled "Things I see at the grocery store". Today's thing I saw is brought to you by Jewel-Osco. For you California folks, I believe it's known as Albertsons.
Before you look at the picture below, let me ask you this: How many times have you wished your butter wasn't just a plain old rectangular cube? (is that the right description for the shape of butter? I did poorly in Geometry. Should Geometry be capitalized? . . . anyway)
In case you're unsure of how many times you've felt that way, the answer is . . . a lot . . . if not ALL the time. Trust me, I majored in Psychology. In fact, I took a class on "The Psychology of how people feel about the shape of their butter".
But I digress.
The point is, you don't have to feel that way anymore . . . AND, if you go shopping today, you're in EXTRA luck, because there's a sale!
In other news, I've decided to start a line of tiny envelopes featuring a persons initials. This is just an example of a persons possible initials. It's important to know that these initials can be changed, there's still time, nothings set in stone yet . . . in fact, you still have 5 months to decide.
Before you look at the picture below, let me ask you this: How many times have you wished your butter wasn't just a plain old rectangular cube? (is that the right description for the shape of butter? I did poorly in Geometry. Should Geometry be capitalized? . . . anyway)
In case you're unsure of how many times you've felt that way, the answer is . . . a lot . . . if not ALL the time. Trust me, I majored in Psychology. In fact, I took a class on "The Psychology of how people feel about the shape of their butter".
But I digress.
The point is, you don't have to feel that way anymore . . . AND, if you go shopping today, you're in EXTRA luck, because there's a sale!
In other news, I've decided to start a line of tiny envelopes featuring a persons initials. This is just an example of a persons possible initials. It's important to know that these initials can be changed, there's still time, nothings set in stone yet . . . in fact, you still have 5 months to decide.
Monday, April 16, 2012
Unicorns and Superman
I often lay awake at night pondering life's most difficult questions.
- What is my purpose?
- Is there a God?
- Why are there so many flavors of gum? Are they all really necessary?
Well guess what world? We don't have to wonder anymore. All of our questions can be answered for just $6.99*, with this new, amazing product:
You can bet this little gem is going on my birthday list**!
In other news, I have added a new product to my line of tiny envelopes. I think you'll be pleased.
*I didn't actually check to see how much the Unicorn button costs.
**I also accept gifts on any other day of the year.
- What is my purpose?
- Is there a God?
- Why are there so many flavors of gum? Are they all really necessary?
Well guess what world? We don't have to wonder anymore. All of our questions can be answered for just $6.99*, with this new, amazing product:
You can bet this little gem is going on my birthday list**!
In other news, I have added a new product to my line of tiny envelopes. I think you'll be pleased.
*I didn't actually check to see how much the Unicorn button costs.
**I also accept gifts on any other day of the year.
Monday, April 2, 2012
Obsession
As some of you may know, I've been known to make AMMMMAAAAZING birthday cards. For those of you that don't know, well, I make AMMMMAAAAAAZING birthday cards, and yes, I'm very modest about it.
The problem with making super-cool-personalized-birthday-cards, is that you have to make or find an envelope that can go with it. Until recently this has been something that I have always struggled with. I would either have to find any old envelope and destroy the integrity of the card by folding it in ways it was never meant to be folded . . . ooooooor, try to create my own envelope out of regular old 8" X 11" piece of paper. Neither situation was ever ideal.
Then, one day, the brilliant Martha Stewart added a new product to her ever growing spectacular line of craft supplies. The envelope maker 5,000*!
Fate knew that we were meant to be together, and without even asking for it, I received one for my birthday.
As most of you know, obsessions don't happen over night.
Was I in love with my new toy? Absolutely.
Did I use it whenever I made someone a birthday card? Of course.
But I wasn't spending all my free time making envelopes. That would be crazy.
Then something changed. The planets aligned, inspiration struck and an obsession was born!
What can you do to anything . . . and I mean ANYTHING, to make it adorable?
Just. make it. smaller.
So that's exactly what I did. It started out with your regular-old-run-of-the-mill multicolored cardstock . . .
. . . . . . . .
. . . . . .
. . . .
. . .
. .
.
Then I started using patterned paper . . .
. . . . . .
. . . . .
. . . .
. . .
. .
.
And then my mind went above and beyond the call of duty and came up with this little masterpiece . . .
I know what you're thinking, "Well that's just a plain old black envelope with a yellow liner, Madelyn. Ain't nothin' too special about that." ( Yes, you're a hick in this situation.)
You poor naive, son of a bitch. It's so, soooooo much more . . .
BAM! . . . I told you.
Never.
Ever.
Ever.
Doubt me.
You may now pin these pictures to Pinterest.
Oh, and in case you want to see all of them beautifully aligned in all of their spectacular magnificence . . .
And now the front.
* This is not the actual name of the envelope maker, but it should be.
The problem with making super-cool-personalized-birthday-cards, is that you have to make or find an envelope that can go with it. Until recently this has been something that I have always struggled with. I would either have to find any old envelope and destroy the integrity of the card by folding it in ways it was never meant to be folded . . . ooooooor, try to create my own envelope out of regular old 8" X 11" piece of paper. Neither situation was ever ideal.
Then, one day, the brilliant Martha Stewart added a new product to her ever growing spectacular line of craft supplies. The envelope maker 5,000*!
Fate knew that we were meant to be together, and without even asking for it, I received one for my birthday.
As most of you know, obsessions don't happen over night.
Was I in love with my new toy? Absolutely.
Did I use it whenever I made someone a birthday card? Of course.
But I wasn't spending all my free time making envelopes. That would be crazy.
Then something changed. The planets aligned, inspiration struck and an obsession was born!
What can you do to anything . . . and I mean ANYTHING, to make it adorable?
Just. make it. smaller.
So that's exactly what I did. It started out with your regular-old-run-of-the-mill multicolored cardstock . . .
. . . . . . . .
. . . . . .
. . . .
. . .
. .
.
Then I started using patterned paper . . .
. . . . . .
. . . . .
. . . .
. . .
. .
.
And then my mind went above and beyond the call of duty and came up with this little masterpiece . . .
I know what you're thinking, "Well that's just a plain old black envelope with a yellow liner, Madelyn. Ain't nothin' too special about that." ( Yes, you're a hick in this situation.)
You poor naive, son of a bitch. It's so, soooooo much more . . .
BAM! . . . I told you.
Never.
Ever.
Ever.
Doubt me.
You may now pin these pictures to Pinterest.
Oh, and in case you want to see all of them beautifully aligned in all of their spectacular magnificence . . .
And now the front.
* This is not the actual name of the envelope maker, but it should be.
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